2024 was an interesting year for me.
- I discovered the awesomeness that is Don Lee.
- I discovered the awesomeness that is Tak Sakaguchi
- I discovered the awesomeness that is Rayna Vallandingham.
- The director of The Night Comes For Us made another movie,
- I watched something that I would never expect I would enjoy.
- I saw one of the greatest martial arts movies ever from the least expected country.
Was there also shit? Yes, there was. So, without further ado here we go.
TV
Shit:
Cobra Kai
After watching the first 5 episodes I found the season racist and insufferable. They emasculated Kenny and made him win a stupid chicken chase. Not to mention they let him shit his pants because that was “funny”. I don’t need to tell you whose piece of shit humor that was.
The next 5 episodes were quite stupid. All kinds of stupid types of martial arts “matches” I’ve never seen in a karate tournament. And why is stick fighting part of a karate tournament? Stick fighting is reserved for martial art forms tournaments and even then, it is not real. Stick fighting is not karate.
Dmitri and Hawk were insufferable as usual. Devon was annoying.
I have to give the writers props, though, that they were quite creative with the plots involving scenes outside of the tournaments. The return of Terry was done very well. I didn’t see that one coming.
The brawl scene in episode 10 was probably the most massive fight in a TV show ever. It even surpassed the school brawl of season 2. Intense, chaotic, crazy.
Kreese and Terry delivered as usual but the real break-out star to me was Zara (Rayna Vallandingham). She was cocky, arrogant, super confident, oozed charisma and is a legit martial arts forms world champion and it shows. The fluidity and intensity to her moves were great to watch. Scott Adkins, cast her in one of your movies, buddy. She is special.
Fans of wrestling saw a cameo by female AEW wrestling star Britt Baker playing a Russian baddie. And of course, politics had to be drawn into it, which I always hate in TV shows and movies. The Russians were using dope and were violent. Give me a fucking break.
And bringing back Kenny should have been done better, after you humiliated him so badly damaged him beyond repair.
The episode 10 brawl was super disrespectful to any martial artist on the planet. They portrayed the fighters as wild and aggressive fucks, who can’t control their temper, while martial arts is all about control. And who caused the brawl? The Russians. Fuck that political bullshit.
The last 5 episodes won’t be much of an improvement in my opinion but they are milking the release for the next year. One thing is for sure, Rayna Vallandingham will steal the show once again.
Good:
Tulsa King season 2
Tulsa King season 1 was ok. Season 2 was a bit better, mainly thanks to the addition of the master of smub bastard acting Neil McDonough. The stakes were higher this season so that is always good. Stallone is almost Get Carter 2000-esque and that is a good thing. Stallone’s Get Carter is awesome, so sue me. Frank Grillo was also added to the mix, but just like Disney, fuck Frank Grillo.
Brassic season 6
The lovable losers are back. Brassic has been a hit and miss in seasons 3 to 5 and 6 continues to continue the trend. However, when the joke is good the joke is good, and you will laugh.
This show could have been even better if they toned down on the smut. The characters are fleshed out and all of them make you laugh from time to time. This stuff could not be made in the US, that is for sure. The cliffhanger was mean and fortunately season 7 will arrive next year.
Vince McMahon Netflix docu
This was a good documentary and quite truthful from what I remember. One of the things that the documentary started with was that Vince said :”I wish I could tell you the real crazy stories.”
Little did he know how prophetic those words would become.
Yes, Vince made wrestling mainstream, but the way he did some things was very questionable.
Especially ironic was the fact that Vince complained that Ted Turner was buying his wrestlers away, while Vince the same and worse in the 80s.
Vince McMahon got into some serious trouble for not paying off a female employe whom he kept as a side dish. Vince was a strange man. A billionaire man-child, with some fucked up ideas. Little did I know he was a coprophile (don’t look it up) and that would come to bite him in the ass. Needless to say he loved to abuse his power and made all the hot women in WWE make out with him on TV, which I found quite fishy. Vince also loved to humiliate certain wrestlers out of pettiness and a lot of those stories are well-known (Saba Simba, for example. For real, Vince?)
For all the bad things Vince did, he also did good things for people who were loyal to him.
However, the way I see it, Vince had his coprophile behaviour, but I totally believe he was set up by TKO and that that plan had been set in motion a long time ago. They set a trap for him and Vince bit. One can’t be allowed to get rich on his own without some gatekeepers allowing you to. And Vince didn’t need no stinking gatekeepers to build an empire. Time will only tell what happens to Vince. Will he go to jail or not? If he goes, his only hope will be that Trump becomes president and gives Vince a presidential pardon. Does he deserve jail? He does, but for other reasons.
Best:
Woa. 4 TV shows I considered the best. I don’t remember ever having a year like that.
Queen Of Villains
This show came out of nowhere. I am a wrestling fan, but I never heard of Dump Matsumoto before, so I was interested to see this show. This show was a biographical TV drama that details the rise of Dump Matsumoto, a fat girl, that had lousy parents and just dreamed of being a pro wrestler even if she was fat and totally out of shape. It was quite inspirational by having the message that if you want to do something you love you will have to work for it and sacrifice much especially when you are not an industry plant and can’t profit of nepotism or beauty. The end match was depicted quite violently, but then my mind got blown when I watched the real match that was done in the 80s. It was definitely that insane and violent. The show did fantastic work to capture that 80s madness of Japanese women’s wrestling.
Brothers Sun
Michelle Yeoh was fantastic in the awesome TV show Strike Back season 5. Then came that weird movie with the weird title that I am too lazy to look up. She was totally not used well there. However, Brothers Sun was her redemption. She played a smart, calculating and sometimes even manipulating mother leading a triad. She didn’t have to give foot and knuckle sandwiches, which we know and love her for and that made it even better. Of course I want to see Michelle Yeah bust some skulls, but in Strike Back she already proved she can do more than that and she proved it in Brothers Sun too. The supporting characters in the show are funny and cool in their own way and that makes the show even more fun. Do you need to know what it is about? No. Just go in there blank and watch that TV show. You won’t regret it.
One Piece
I never saw the anime, so I didn’t know what to expect when I decided to watch this. What I got was a TV show, that was made with so much love and care and great world building, that I could not wait for the next episode. I don’t know any of the people in the TV show except for Craig Fairbrass. This is a funny, exciting and adventurous show. And it is agenda free. Is that even possible today?
Crooks
Man. This TV show was the best TV show of the year. Lots of suspense, tension, beautiful locations. What more do you need? See my review here!
Movies
Shit:
Jackpot
John China and Akwafina in one movie. You can’t make that shit up.
When you look at the movie, I also wonder who made that shit up. This is a time I will never get back.
We are not even 5 minutes into the movie and already there is some feminist bullshit in it.
Were where the feminists when that female Italian boxer got whooped by a male during the
olympics? I thought so. Jackpot is everything that is wrong with Hollywood movies today. Everything. If you don’t feel insulted after watching this crap, you have some serious soul searching to do. Hello McFly? Anybody home? Hollywood will never change their tune if you devour the crap they serve.
Lights Out
Why the fuck does Scott Adkins need to be the bitch of bitch Grillo in the movie? I don’t like Grillo anymore and I would never watch a movie with him unless Scott Adkins is in there as well. Scott Adkins deserves the support of everyone. I expected more of Scott Adkins and just got a little. It was all about Grillo being a tough guy, which is a bit too farfetched. Some people might like it. I hated it.
Duchess
I don’t remember much from this movie, except that it was really crappy and I wish I got the time I lost back.
Nice Girls
What a waste of Steffi Celma from Dix Pour Cent fame. This was supposed to be comedy with 2 women laying down the law in the French city of Nice. It was sooooooo lame. A missed opportunity.
The Killer
I hope John Woo got paid well for this crap. Man, what a crap. Total misuse of Tcheky Karyo and having a woman play Chow Fun Fat’s role. Man. Way to piss on your own legacy.
Smile 2
I didn’t even see Smile 1 if there is one, but this had Naomi Scott in it so it was worth a try.
Didn’t know Naomi Scott had the action chops that much. She can play a lunatic pretty well.
Too bad the rest of the movie was utter shit and totally illogical and stupid. It also didn’t help
Naomi Scott looked like Miley Cyrus and that is not a compliment.
Miley Cyrus looking motherfucker
Good:
Borgo
This was an interesting little movie about a female prison guard in Corsica, which seems to be a hotbed for criminals. I didn’t know what direction that movie was actually heading, because it seemed it could go in a lot of directions. The French do gritty stuff better than anyone else. I think it is time I finally finish watching the French TV show Mafiosa, which is about a woman who becomes the boss of one of the biggest Corsican mafia families.
One Percenter
With this movie I discovered an action star, Tak Sakaguchi, I didn’t know before. This was a very good movie with quite an interesting context. Want to see some different action? Watch this movie. See my review here.
Badland Hunters
Never heard of Don Lee, but the dude packs a punch. When he punches someone, it looks like he kills them. A great style to view. This was kind of an apocalyptic movie, which showed something that might happen in our future. A very scary thought. Sooner or later, we will have to go Don Lee on the enemy. I am a poet, and I didn’t know it. Oooooooooooooow.
One More Shot
Sequel to Scott Adkin’s One Shot definitely didn’t disappoint. It did have a B-movie look, but that is often the case with Scott Adkins movies. You have to see through this. Scott was excellent in this movie and more of a soldier than a martial artist this time. Suspense and action define this movie and it is good to see Adkins do what he loves most. Making movies that don’t insult your intelligence. Big bonus is that they are always agenda free.
Cat And Dog
Philippe Lacheau and gang are back for another bundle of fun. This movie is about a cat and a dog who get lost and the owners want to find them back. The movie is made from the point of the cat and the dog and is quite endearing. Not only that, but there are also some good laughs as we are used to whenever Philippe Lacheau and gang are involved. For animal lovers this is must-see.
La salaire de la peur
Remake of an old French movie called …
Interesting. Nitroglycerine was interesting.
Les Infaillibles
Chubby actress … is 100 times more funny than chubby American actress … Heck, she is even funnier than any female “comedian” in Hollywood. This was a funny buddy cop movie with enough laughs. The French know how to do comedy. Hollywood could learn a lot from them.
3 Jours Max
The French gang of Philippe Lacheau is back. Some good laughs and absurd situations as usual and I wouldn’t want it either way.
Bad Hombres
Low budget movie that was interesting from beginning to end. Not much action, but a bit of suspense and a small bit of violence.
Get Fast
This movie looked quite 80s. A simple low budget movie that was a lot of fun with Lou Diamond Phillips having a curious part. This is the kind of movie you would find in a VHS rental store in the 80s and would just rent, because it screamed low budget.
Boy Kills World
Man, this movie definitely had its own style. Visually appealing, a bit wacky and some good violence. The title didn’t invite me at all, but damn if the movie wasn’t good and entertaining. Yaajan Runian from The Raid fame was in this as well. This was a movie that tried to be different and totally succeeded. Another bonus was Andrew Koji of Warrior fame being in it and playing a role of a funny lunatic. Didn’t know he had the comedic chops. He should try some more comedy.
Beverly Hills Cop 4
This movie had not the right to be as entertaining as it was. This was a return to form for Eddie Murphy. However, the father daughter relationship bullshit was just too much.
Why do they always do that father kid bullshit after a few sequels?
Take Cover
This low budget sniper movie from Scott Adkins and he delivered. I am not a fan of the concept of snipers unless they snipe the correct people, but this is a movie so I can live with it. This was quite a suspenseful movie and not a movie you are used to seeing from Scott Adkins. Now go make Accident Man 3, Debt Collectors 3, Undisputed 5 and Avengement 2, Scott.
Diabolik III (Diabolik Chi Sei?)
Yes, there is another Diabolik movie and I just love that stuff. Often, when comic movies are made, people think of that stinking pile of shit crap that Disney Marvel.
Diabolik ain’t none of that shit. The Italians have something good going on and I think there will be a lot more sequels. The Diabolik movies are interesting
time pieces and reminds you of the movies of old. And what is good is that they do a good portrayal of Diabolik and Eva Kant, although they could have been a bit more vicious. In the comic Diabolik is a nasty piece of work but I guess they don’t want to chase off the audience. Keep those movies coming.
The Round Up : Punishment
Don Lee once again delivers a hard punch. I didn’t know this was the fourth part of a movie series. I hope there are many more to come. Don Lee doesn’t kick ass. He just punches you into next week.
I am now binge watching his best movies and it is an absolute blast.
Ferry 2
I didn’t even know they were gonna release another Ferry movie, so this just came in time yesterday. For those of you who don’t know, Ferry is the bad guy from the critically acclaimed Belgian-Dutch TV show called Undercover. One of the best TV shows ever made.
Ferry is the spin-off from that show following his rise to the top of drugs underworld. There is also a Ferry TV series and season 2 is upcoming. The Undercover stuff is the best thing that ever happened to Dutch TV, although mainly the Belgians are responsible for the atmosphere of the TV show. Ferry 2 delivered once again but wasn’t good enough for the best category. But hey, not everything can be the best.
Best:
City Hunter
Japan finally made a live action City Hunter and it is about time. Jackie Chan’s City Hunter was funny, wacky and enjoyable, but not really a City Hunter movie. Philippe Lacheau and crew’s 2017 City Hunter, aka Nicky Larsson, was the better City Hunter and personally I thought it could not be topped. However, the Japanese did it. This was the definite City Hunter movie. Funny, wacky lechours Ryo Saeba was on a roll and the action scenes were the way City Hunter action scenes should be. An adaption that succeeded. Here is to more City Hunter movies.
The Beekeeper
Statham is back. The last good movie he made was Crank 2 and since then it has been a shitfest to the max. Not Beekeeper, though. Statham returned to form and kicked some serious ass. That he kicked the asses of privileged white brats made it even more enjoyable. Give nerds money and power and you will see what despicable people they will become. This was a feel-good movie. I wouldn’t mind seeing a Beekeeper 2, although a Transporter movie would be better. Crank 2 can’t be topped anyway.
The Shadow Strays
I didn’t even know the director of The Night Comes For Us made another action movie, so color me surprised when I found out. I had high hopes for this although the premise might be over the top a bit (a 17 year old ninja assassin). This movie was violent as fuck. The opening scene alone already sets the tone for the shit to come. The Shadow Strays has the distinction to have made the best female fighting scene ever. That was some bloody and savage shit. Not only that, it wasn’t even girl power focused or some man-hating shit, that Hollywood usually shits out. It was a movie about what you would to do protect/save the people you care about. The action was insane, and Aurora Ribero has a great future ahead of her. And while I am at it, FUCK Hit Girl and fuck that piece of shit movie which I don’t even remember the title of.
Kill
Holy shit. Did this movie kick some serious ass. Absolutely the best movie of the year. If you haven’t seen this movie by now your movie lover card should be revoked right now. Vidyut Jammwal already put India on the map as a country that can make action movies, but Kill took the Indian action movie to the next level. Cross The Night Comes for Us with The Raid and you will get Kill. Kill showed me once again why I love action movies. And guess what, Chad Stahelski bought the rights so they can make a Hollywood version of Kill. I wish he didn’t. Chad will not be able to top Kill.
My review here:
Docus
The Greatest Night In Pop
This was interesting to watch. It is always mindboggling how there was a crew filming that stuff. It seems there are a lot of money grabbing bastards who want to record everything so they can make money from it many, many years later. Ever since Woodstock 69 any phenomenon has been filmed only to be used many years later. I called it programmed trends, because that is what they were.
In this documentary there were quite a few artists, and Michael Jackson seems to have been the real deal. It was very cool to see Bob Dylan exposed as a fraud. Never was a fan of his, so it was too funny to see him come up with excuse after excuse for not being able to sing.
It was obvious Michael Jackson was the one who contributed the most to the We Are The World song. A nice watch behind the scenes for sure.
Freaknik
What happens when you create spring break for the black community of America? Freaknik.
It was disgusting to see how something created for and by the black community attracted so many leeches and other scumbags. Not to mention hoe heat die fast die de meters verneukt heft?
Stories
Giulia debut
The gorgeous and charismatic Giulia made her debut in WWE in the NXT federation.
Rock + Oprah
Raising money for Hawai by Rock and Oprah was as cringe as it can be. Here you have 2 millionaires asking or money, while they themselves could donate the amount of money needed for Hawai and wouldn’t lose a night’s sleep over it. Instead, they ask the people. As if people have enough money to donate. The Despicable Duo of 2024 were definitely Rock and Oprah.
Rock Army Recruit
Dwayne Johnson is one of the biggest sell-outs ever. Making millions of dollars doesn’t make up for being a low life. Now imagine these million dollars making asshole getting paid to make a commercial for the army to entice young and gullible people to join the army. Rock never joined the army so he should shut the fuck up. I never joined an army either, but that doesn’t mean I am telling people to join the army and get paid for it. Joining the army is no use. You know who the real enemy is and you don’t want to be their puppet. EVER.
Sell Out Kid Rock
One year after going viral with his anti-Bud light clip, he sold his ass. I guess his Bud Lite rant was all for show.More and more celebrities sell out these days and Kid Rock is a perfect example. Fuck him.
Kyrie Irving
How I wanted Kyrie to help Nikola Jokic and the Denver Nuggets to win the NBA championship again. It would have been perfect revenge for the shit the media and all the other sell-out scumbags put him through. Unfortunately, it was not meant to be and that is a shame. Still, Kyrie Irving will remain one of the greatest people that ever came from the US. He is the Djokovic of NBA.
Olympic GAYmes 2024
If the Paris olympic games showed something it was, that humanity dumbed down even more than I thought it did. They made a mockery of the games with the LGBT agenda and spat in your face multiple times. And you loved it. Yes, you. I am talking to you, motherfuckers, who should have boycotted the shit out this Olympic Gaymes. But then again, you guys watch Netflix, so no surprise there. The Olympic Gaymes mocked you and you liked it. Thank you, ma’am, may I have another?
Djokovic olympic champ
Djokovic, the man who gets hated for not taking a vaccine, finally won his olympic games tennis medal. He performed a masterclass of tennis on the super strong upstart Carlos Alcazar. Everybody thought Alcazar would win the final easily, but Djokovic took him to the next level. That is what champions are. You perform when it is needed even if the world hates you for the most stupid reason. And he did it about one month after he had a knee operation. That is just crazy.
Euros
Fuck the European Football championships. I am not wasting any more time on that.
Vince McMahon
One of the biggest stories of the year was that Vince McMahon got himself into a lot of trouble. He turned out to be a perv, who abused men and women and pissed away his legacy. The lawsuit is still going on we will have to see if Vince is found guilty or not. Only time will tell.
Tom Waes car accident
Tom Waes, Belgian actor, who got famous for the Undercover TV show, got into a drink and drive accident. He didn’t kill anyone, but he got into a small coma but is awake now and Belgium is waiting to see what the consequences for his behaviour will be. He is a fucking fool. He became iconic in Undercover only to throw it away for a few stink drinks. How to waste a career the Belgian way.
RIP
Louis Gosset Jr
Honey Roy Palmer is no more, and neither is the mentor of Matthew Star. Louis Gossett Jr was one of my favourite black actors. From Midnight Sting (Diggstown) to Matthew Star, to Iron Eagle to Enemy Mine, Louis Gossett Jr delivered.
Virgil
It is a shame Virgil never got away from the reputation of being The Milion Dollar Man’s flunky.
The Million Dollar man was a wrestler based on Vince McMahon and the Million Dollar Man needed a bodyguard and that was Virgil. They were hated AF during the 80s and Virgil definitely took most of the heat. When they split up the combo of Million Dollar Man and Virgil shortly thereafter Virgil’s career was done. He had a joke spot in WCW being the NWO’s flunky, but I hope he got paid well for it. Afterwards Virgil had to make ends meet and unfortunately became an internet meme, which is quite sad. He deserved better.
OJ
Call me crazy, but I believe OJ was innocent!
Sika and Afa
What are the chances of wrestling tag team partners to die in the same year? So sad.
In the 70s and 80s Afa and Sika “terrorised” the wrestling rings as the Wild Samoans.
Fabulous gimmicks that cracked me up They were an example of what was good with wrestling.
Sid Vicious
Sid Vicious, Sid Justice, Psycho Sid. If there ever was a man that looked like a god it was Sid Vicious. Making the rings unsafe from the 80s until the beginning of 2000s Sid stood out. He commanded the room and the ring. At one time he was supposed to succeed Hulk Hogan as the ultimate good guy, but he refused to do it. Still he had a great career.
Johan Neeskens
Outside of football fans(soccer, not that handegg bullshit), no one knows who this guy is. This guy was a charismatic legendary Dutch football player who was tough as nails. If the Netherlands had 11 versions of Johan Neeskens they would have become world champ already. But no, the Dutch team consists of a lot of pussies who couldn’t lift up spit, if their life depended on it.
Morgan Lofting
The voice of GI Joe’s Baroness. See Stalkeye’s obituary for more info here!
Paul Di Anno
Paul was underrated. To this day the first Iron Maiden album is still my favorite. I never followed why he left Iron Maiden and I am too lazy to look it up now. I wonder what would have happened had he stayed.
Tony Todd
Tony Todd was a particular actor. Oozing charisma, oozing menace and just a good actor. Candy Man made him famous, and I will remember him for the movies Enemy Territory, Final Destination and The Debt Collector. I see Debt Collector as his swan song.
Here is Stalkeye’s obituary!
John Ashton
John Ashton was quite the character actor. You might know him from Beverly Hills Cop, the cult TV show Hardball or Midnight Run.
The man always brought something extra to his roles, while he didn’t look like a pussy lotion boy. When I saw him in Beverly Hills Cop
4 he didn’t look good, so I guess that is why he didn’t have a bigger role and that is just a shame. You should have given him more
to do if you know he might not make until the end of the year. My most enjoyable movie of his was bounty hunter Marvin in the legendary
movie Midnight Run. He taught me the expression pecker breath, which at that time, was censored in the Dutch subtitles. To find out years later
what a pecker is (thanks Vertigo Preacher) just made the expression pecker breath even funnier. And Marvin could have been
a Dutchman, because he didn’t share his fries.
Cochise David Harris
Any of the Warriors characters are legendary. To see any of them die just sucks. Warriors is the greatest movie ever and little did all those
actors know how much impact that little movie from 1979 would have on the world. Cult doesn’t come any better than that and no matter if those actors got shitty role after shitty role after The Warriors, they will always be remembered as The Warriors. You can’t leave a legacy
better than that.
David Harris as Cochise on the left. Marcelino Sanchez as Rembrandt on the left. Two Warriors in heaven now.